My Body’s Call to Find Solace In The Ocean

Since September, my body has been whack. Really it’s been longer than that, but in more subtle ways. As time has gone on, with the low-grade stress of the pandemic, work, and personal issues, my body has been screaming at me louder and louder to pause, get a change of scenery, and breathe it all in.

Sometimes I ask myself, “how could I possibly be so stressed when all I’m doing 99% of the time is sitting at home?” and I make myself feel unworthy of taking a break. But I’m realizing just how much being at home, mostly isolated, can take a toll on a person. And we’re all going through it. We all feel stuck and stagnant.

My body is making it so that I don’t have a choice but to do what it asks of me. I have two choices: listen, or push myself until my body shuts down and I have no vitality left. It’s not functioning the way it’s designed to. Even though I move daily, eat a balanced diet, get enough quality sleep and practice meditation, it’s not enough.

My body is craving the salty ocean, the wind in my hair, the sound of the water splashing up on the beach, and birds soaring and singing above me. It’s craving trees and mountains, adventure, spontaneity, quiet mornings, evenings of stargazing, bonfires, new friends, and most importantly, rest.

My body can not take any more zoom meetings, the same 800 square feet of space every single day, the overindulgent laziness of the couch, and a limited natural environment with nowhere to escape the sounds and smells of traffic, aggravated drivers, a polluted lake, and the same conversations over and over again. I have nowhere to go to just scream at the top of my lungs without worrying close neighbours or passersby.

I need space. I need time. I need quiet. I need the right kind of solitude. I need scenery, and fresh air. The water is calling out to me. It’s time for me to listen.